Seven Years
by emcaro
Summary: These are my seven years when my best friend became my worst enemy. My worst enemy became my best and most trusted friend. A dog became my brother. And the boy I swore I would hate forever, I realized I would love until the day I die. This is my story.
1. Prologue

Prologue

I have a rather monumental declaration to make. Are you ready for it? Are you certain? Okay, here goes. Life is not fair. No one knows this better than me. Well, one person may know this better than me. See for the past six years, he has been making my life sort of resemble the seventh circle of hell. What I never realized was that I was doing him a similar favor.

To fully understand the tangled mess I have allowed my life to become I have to take you back.

All the way back. Back to first year. The time of innocence. Naivety. Drooble's Best Blowing Gum.

I could go further back than that. I could explain that my sister and I used be quite close. She was my very best friend. Only eighteen months older than me, she was the perfect age for both playmate and protector. I could analyze her reaction to any magical inclination of mine. I could call it fear with a hint of jealousy even. I could go into terrible detail the horrible row we had when I received my Hogwarts letter. I was feeling much as any muggleborn witch would feel upon entry to this strange new world. Disbelief, shock, delight, panic. I needed my sister then more than ever to ease that painful transition. Instead of stepping in and rescuing me, she abandoned me. Abandoned me to the boy down the street who would become my liason to the magical world. He was more than willing to talk out my fears of inadequacy, to comfort me, and even go a step further, doing what Petunia could not have even if she'd wanted to, by pointing me in the direction of a good book on beginning hexes, or explain an incomprehensible word. He taught the very first real magic I ever did. He became my translator, my teacher, my shield, my friend, and I loved him for it. But more about him later. His part will come, be patient.

I could tell you that my parents were thrilled, proud, exuberant, exultant. They could not believe that they could have raised someone so special. I was destined for great things, so they thought. After all, how could I not be? I could do magic. I was unstoppable. They did not realize that everyone else at Hogwarts would be able to do magic as well, and their expectations nearly crushed me, even before I got on the train.

The train. That's where we will begin. Anything else is incidental. The train is where it all began.

My name is Lily Alixandra Evans. These are my years, years of turmoil, of conflict. Of love and redemption. My seven years when my best friend became my worst enemy. My worst enemy became my best and most trusted friend. A dog became my brother. And the boy I swore I would hate forever, I realized I would love until the day I die.

These are my seven years.


	2. Where Dwell the Brave at Heart

**Okay. I've sort of/kind of totally revised the story. Well maybe not totally. But I went through and made it more canon. For instance, the dark haired chick named Dorcas Meadows doesn't really exist anymore. Well, she does under a different name. But Averie Dawson? My OC? She is now Dorcas Meadows. If that's too confusing, you might want to reread a little. I've changed a few other little things. SO sorry about the wait. I just got caught up with life. Review please!!!**

You know how you lay eyes on someone and you know, deep in your gut, that it is significant? That this moment is so life-altering that you will always look back on it and think, oh yeah, I was wearing my green sweater the day I met so and so? Well I had no such thought when I first laid eyes upon James Potter and Sirius Black.

I did not realize that my life would one day revolve around them, and theirs around me. They were just boys. Little boys. Arrogant, annoying little boys with a sense of humor I did not find remotely funny. They sauntered into the compartment I shared with the boy down the street, whose name was was Severus by the way, as though they owned it. In a way, they did. Years later, I was passing that same compartment, and I began to laugh, the kind of laughter that bubbles up, and will be stifled until it has run its course. As I passed this particular compartment, I saw a dusty plaque emblazoned with: Compartment C: Donated in loving memory of Mr. Harold Ignatius Potter: 1848-1947. But I digress. Even if Potter's family did sort of own the compartment, it did not excuse their behavior.

Tears rolled down my face as I leaned my forehead against the cold glass of the window. I watched it fog up with my breath and tried my hardest not to picture Tuney's last expression. Freak. She called me a freak. I had seen her face, she really meant it. Tuney was a horrible liar. We shouldn't have done it. We shouldn't have looked at that letter. Speak of the devil. Severus slid open the compartment door and sat down beside me. I looked at him then resumed my staring out the window.

"I don't want to talk to you."

"Why not?" Sev sounded bewildered. For some reason, this upset me further.

"Tuney h-hates me. Because we saw that letter from Dumbledore."

"So what?" Didn't he understand? My sister was all I had at home. I needed her. I needed her to hide behind. She was my best friend. I realized she didn't like the idea of me going of to Hogwarts alone, she'd made that clear by writing the headmaster and begging him to admit her, but I didn't realize she would let her jealousy drive her to hate me.

"So she's my sister!" I said simply.

"She's only a --" He paused. I turned to wipe my eyes. Sev seemed to be searching for something to say that would not upset me.

"But we're going! This is it!" I had never heard him so exhilerated. "We're off to Hogwarts!" I nodded, and smiled a bit. This seemed to buoy Sev on.

"You'd better be in Slytherin."

"Slytherin?" Another voice entered our conversation. Here it is. That moment I was telling you about. The one that had no significance to me at the time. Here it is. The boy speaking was small, slight, and black-haired, like Sev, but that was where the similarities ended. While Sev had a distinctly thrown-away quality, this boy looked well-cared for, even adored. His hair was tossled and messy as though it had never seen a brush, and he wore wire rim glasses.

"Who wants to be in Slytherin? I think I'd leave, wouldn't you?" He directed this question to the boy he had been talking to, another black-haired boy, this one with a distinctly aristocratic air. Both boys had the look of those used to getting their own ways easily. The second boy did not smile.

"My whole family have been in Slytherin."

"Blimey," the first boy looked a bit disappointed. "And I thought you seemed all right!" The second boy grinned. He had a nice grin. His face was much too mature, his eyes too old, but his grin was mischevious, beginning in a smirk, slowly making him look more his age.

"Maybe I'll break the tradition. Where are you heading, if you've got the choice?"

The first boy lifted an invisible sword.

"Gryffindor, where dwell the brave at heart! Like my dad." His face softened when he mentioned his dad. Sev did not seem to notice. He snorted. The boy turned on him.

"Got a problem with that?"

"No," Sev replied, though he _did _seem to be sneering slightly. "If you'd rather be brawny than brainy."

"Where're you hoping to go, seeing as you're neither?" The second boy's nice grin had disappeared leaving a withering glare in its place that rather frightened me. The first boy laughed as though this were the funniest thing he had heard all day. I had heard enough.

"Come on Severus, let's find another compartment." I glared at both boys.

"Oooooo....." I could hear them mimicking me as I moved to exit. The boy with the glasses stuck his foot out, tripping Sev as we went. I caught his elbow, and we left with as much dignity as we could.

"See ya Snivellous!" I heard one of them call behind us as I slammed the door shut behind me.

"How rude!" I was flushed, and my hands were in fists. Sev's face was paler than usual. "What-- What--" I couldn't come up with an insult terrible enough to match my fury. Gradually I calmed down. Sev seemed to be cooling off as well.

"Come on Sev. Let's find somewhere else to sit."

"You go ahead. I'll catch up. I told my mum I'd say hello to some of her friends children."

"I'll come with you."

"NO!" I jumped.

"I mean no, you go ahead. I'll just be a second."

"Oookay Sev. If you're sure."

"I'm sure." He didn't look sure. He looked downright panicked at the thought of me coming along. What kind of friends were these?

___________________________________________________________________

You know how sometimes, you meet someone, and you seem to click? There is an instant connection and you know that it is the beginning of a beautiful friendship. Well in there was no such click when I first met Dorcas Meadows. In fact, you might even say we despised each other on sight.

"Hi." My voice trembled as I nervously clutched the compartment door, praying this girl wouldn't kick me out. There was no where else to go if she did. Everywhere else was full. The girl did not look up from her book. I silently cursed Sev for leaving me alone, even just for a moment. He swore he would be back before I had to make meaningless conversation with anyone. Oh well. This girl didn't seem to be one for meaningless conversation anyway.

"Do you mind?" I asked as I moved into the compartment to sit in the seat closest to the door, farthest from the girl. She looked up.

"Do _you _mind?" She asked coldly, before returning to her book.

That was rude and uncalled for. It also shut me up. Minutes passed with no sign of Sev. Boredom drove me to studying my silent companion. She was tiny, smaller than me, though that was not saying much, with long blonde hair and large eyes set in a thin face. She had already changed into her Hogwarts robes making me worry that I was remiss in not doing so already.

"All right, what?" She snapped. She had looked up from her book in a quick motion, the sudden movement and noise making me jump.

"What, what?"

"What is your problem? You have been staring at me since you got here. Are you mentally ill or something?" She glared at me and I found myself glaring back. I did not know this girl, and I had never been one to judge quickly, but I found myself utterly loathing her.

"No, I am not mentally ill. Although I was beginning to think you mute. I have been in here for ten minutes and you have not said one word to me. Do you have any idea how rude that is?" The girl looked incredulous. A strand of her blonde hair fell in her face but she made no move to remove it.

"Are you lecturing me?"

"Maybe you need it." In a huff, I exited the compartment, not paying a bit of attention to my surroundings. I ran directly into Sev who did his funny smiling with his eyes thing, and put me back on my feet.

"Making friends?"

"Not likely." He actually looked rather pleased by this answer, making me laugh ruefully.

"You should probably change. We'll be arriving soon, and you don't want to show up in that." He gestured to my muggle clothing, and pointed me in the direction of the bathroom. A horrible thought struck me.

"Don't run off, okay? I don't want to walk up to the school alone." Again, he seemed pleased.

"I won't move." I smiled at him.

"Don't even breathe." He made a show of freezing in his position and I giggled.

"You'd better hurry," he said out of the corner of his mouth. "I can't hold this for very long."

******************************

"Firs' yers this way. I said firs' yers over here!" A loud voice carried over the ruckus of the train station in Hogsmeade. Everyone seemed eager to make their way to the horseless carriages. I was confused. Should I follow the large crowd of upperclassmen making their way toward the carriages, or make my way towards the rather terrifying, potentially dangerous giant-like creature. My course of action was a no brainer.

"Sev..."

"I have no idea. I don't know. No one ever told me about this part."

"Sev..." I could feel panic closing in on me like a hot, heavy blanket.

"Just calm down Lily. It's not the end of the world. Let's go ask her." He motioned towards a tall and highly unpleasant looking blonde girl, wearing a green and silver scarf.

"We are first years, and we are a bit confused about which way to go. Could you help us?" Severus looked as though the effort of asking for help was taking quite a bit out of him. I smiled up at the girl, but she glared witheringly back at me over her nose. After a short staring contest, she trilled in a voice much too high and little girl-like for someone so unpleasant,

"First years go with Hagrid. The half-breed over there." She flicked a slim, white hand in the giant's direction. He was currently hustling James Potter, Sirius Black, and a tall good looking boy with floppy black hair, into a boat on a huge, clear lake. The lake resembled a giant mirror to me, marred only by the occasional ripple made by the breeze. The moon, barely a sliver tonight, was reflected flawlessly.

"Thanks so much." Severus still looking as though he had swallowed something unpleasant, steered me towards the boats, still eyeing me as though preparing for a nervous breakdown.

"I'm fine Sev. Just a minor freak-out. Nothing to worry about." I grinned at him, and he smiled wryly back, only half believing me, I think. We climbed into the boats, me holding tightly to Hagrid's offered arm as the boat tilted unsteadily. It was already occupied by two others, the little blonde girl from before, and a pale, unhealthy looking boy whom I did not recognize. The blonde girl who had been staring into the dark lake pensively, looked up only to give me a dirty look. She quickly resumed her staring. Severus glanced at me questioningly, but I merely rolled my eyes.

"Hello." I turned to the pale boy sitting across from me.

"Hi." He smiled at me. His smile surprised me. It lit up his face, transforming it. His eyes crinkled and his entire demeanor changed and seemed to glow.

"I'm Lily Evans."

"Remus Lupin." His voice was not what I had expected either. I had predicted high and nasal. His voice was neither. It was raspy and low, but pleasant, a voice you could listen to for hours. Meaning to continue the conversation, if only to continue listening to that lovely voice, I opened my mouth to speak, without any real idea of what I was going to say. Swiftly, I closed it again. I had just caught sight of the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. It was a castle. A sprawling, magnificant castle. The most magnificant castle I had ever seen. Possibly the only castle I had ever seen, but the most magnificant on just the same. My gasp caused the other three in the boat to turn and look. We all sat, stunned into an awed silence. There was nothing to say. We were going to live _there_. We were going to _live _there. That was home.


	3. A Day of Firsts

**Just some name changes in this chapter. Nothing major. Review!**

"When these doors open, you will enter the Great Hall, make your way to the front and get into a line at which point I will call you in alphabetical order to be sorted into your Houses." The woman speaking was by far the most frightening woman I had ever met. It was there in the set of her mouth, the stern, no-nonsense look in her eye. She scared the living daylights out of me. Her name, as she had told us moments after we set foot on dry land, shaky and exhilerated, was Professor McGonagall. "There are four Houses," she continued, "Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, and Slytherin. They are _equal._ No House is more well-regarded than the other. While you are here, your House will be like your family. Your triumphs will gain you points. Any rule breaking," she glared around, "will lose you points. After you are sorted, go directly to your table and sit down." At this point, she consulted an elaborate timepiece on her wrist. "It's time. Follow me."

Severus smiled at me encouragingly, and I followed the boy in front of me through the doors and into the Hall. The messy-haired boy from the train caught me eye. He winked, but I looked away. Walking into the Great Hall was an experience like no other. Before this point, I had never seen so many magical people gathered in one spot. I hadn't seen so many people in one spot. At the front of the room I saw the staff. I caught sight of a dimunitive man with wild, white hair whom I recognized. Professor Flitwick came to my house soon after I received my Hogwarts letter in order to give some explanation for what I had convinced myself was an elaborate hoax. Seeing me staring, he gave a little wave. I waved back, and told myself that vomiting would be a bad idea right now.

I busied myself with taking in every detail of the Great Hall. It was amazing! The candles were suspended in midair, nothing holding them up. The plates in front of each student appeared to be made of solid gold. And the ceiling. The ceiling was the most extraordianry thing I had ever seen in my short life. It mirrored the clear night outside perfectly. I could see every star. Before I realized what was happening, we were at the front of the Hall. Judging by the shocked looks on the faces of my fellow first years, they had been as enraptured as I. Professor McGonagall jumped right into the sorting.

Avery, Ingrum.

SLYTHERIN

Bainbridge Conner

HUFFLEPUFF

I tried to concentrate on what was happening, search for something that would help me with this unfamiliar process. As far as I could tell, a person just put on the hat and shouted out a house. It took longer for some. Bainbridge Conner took three agonizing minutes to place in Hufflepuff, while Avery, Ingrum took barely a second to place in Slytherin. I was pulled out of my musings by a familiar face. The boy from the train, the one with the nice grin, was being called. Black, Sirius. He was not grinning now. He seemed to be concentrating very hard on something. His sorting took longer. After an inestimable amount of time, the hat shouted,

GRYFFINDOR!

A hush fell over Hogwarts. I didn't see the significance of this, not yet. The Slytherins' scowls seemed more pronounced. Then the Gryffindors roared their approval, practically shaking the banners. Black, Sirius's face lit up with that grin, and he practically strutted to Gryffindor table. Something had just happened here, something big, but I had no time to dwell upon it before returning to my obsessing.

More names were called.

Dawson, Averie became a

RAVENCLAW

and the boy with whom Black Sirius and his bespectacled friend had come over on the boats became a

HUFFLEPUFF

Before I knew it, Evans, Lily was called.

I inched towards the rickety stool on shaking legs. I reached it, and Professor McGonagall smiled tightly down at me. I sat down. She dropped the hat onto my head.

_OH you are not difficult at all. No question. Has to be_

GRYFFINDOR

Gryffindor?

Shooting Sev an apologetic glance, I headed off towards the scarlet and gold banners. Gryffindor. Gryffindor. I knew nothing about Gryffindor. Sev had said that the brawny went there. I was not brawny. I was rather tall and spindly. With one more backward glance at Sev, who was looking as though he had lost his best friend, I moved on to join my fellow _Gryffindors_. Black, Sirius grinned up at me. I knew that grin. This was the boy from the train, one of the boys who had been simply horrible to Severus. The boy, Sirius Black, moved down a bit, making room for me to sit next him, but I turned my back on him, sitting instead beside a tall pretty older girl.

"Oh, but aren't you adorable." The older girl smiled down at me. She had light brown hair, and matching eyes. Her face was round and sweet, like that of an ad for apple pie, and she did not seem to know how to frown.

"I'm Alice Montague. Ignore anything you've ever heard about the Montagues. I don't know them. We've never met." She winked.

"Marlene." Perched beside Alice was a second girl, small, skinny, and sort of fragile looking. She had spiky ink black hair. Her voice was high, clear, and bell like, a stark difference from Alice's soft drawl. She reminded me sharply of a bird.

"Marlene Mckinnon. I'm a second year."

I was also introduced to Isabella Duncon, Jessica Langley, and Christine Johnson, all friends of Alice's sitting in our little cluster at Gryffindor table. Each girl was friendly and seemed interested in everything I had to say, giving me a funny, warm glow. Even hearing Dorcas Meadows be sorted into Gryffindor did not kill my buzz in the least. Neither did the last girl to whom I was introduced.

"Emmeline Vance." The last girl did not smile. She did not even nod in my direction. She merely glanced at her witheringly, before turning back to the tall, red haired boy sitting next to her, who shot me a sympathetic smile.

"She's a third year." Alice said rolling her eyes. "Like me. And this is Frank Longbottom." She pointed at the tall, dark-haired boy two seats down, currently chatting with a boy Alice didn't bother to introduce. He turned to smile at me and nod. He had a nice smile, and I liked him immediately. The sorting continued behind us as we spoke.

"Lots of Slytherins this year." The boy, Frank Longbottom commented amid Slytherin cheers, as Nott, Orion went to join his new family. Alice Davies bit her lip, but did not answer. Dorcus however leaned over me,

"Look at them all! Bloody evil, they are. It's You Know Who's influence. That's why there's so many." Isabella spat in her raspy voice as Knott, Ana was sorted into Slytherin.

"No I don't." I found my voice again. Isabella stared at me as though I had grown a second head, and I almost lost my nerve.

"Don't what?"

"Don't know who. You said You Know Who. I don't know who." Several of the surroundings students laughed, but a few looked at me with expressions akin to pity.

"Of course she doesn't know who!" Alice said fiercely. "Honestly Isabella, do want to scare the poor girl into going home before she's even settled in properly? Leave her alone!"

"How bout a change of subject!" Frank interjected cheerfully, as Potter, James was sorted into Gryffindor, and they covered their ears to buffer the surrounding noise.

"That's all for the sorting," Frank continued, "and there are only two Gryffindor girls! Can you believe that? I don't reckon we've had anything like that in a long time."

"Who's the other girl?" Marlene asked in her soft, sing-song voice.

"Dorcas Meadows." He motioned to a girl currently sitting with a small boy. I stifled a groan as I realized it was the same girl I had gotten into a row with on the train! Alice, noticing my expression, looked concerned.

"What's wrong?"

"We don't get along." I replied stiffly.

"Oh, but you will! When McGonagall said that your House would become like your family, she wasn't kidding! I give you two weeks before you're as close as sisters."


	4. Remarkably Chivalric Shockingly Immature

**Changed the description of Andromeda Black. I decided I didn't like her being a metamorphagus. It makes Tonks feel to ordinary. And Tonks is one my favorite characters so we can't have that, now can we? Review, please!!**

Chapter Three: A Day of Firsts

A man at the center of the staff's table stood, silencing all conversation in the Hall. It amazed me how one man's presence could get such a reaction out of a bunch of hungry schoolchildren. He was tall and thin with long silvery hair, and a matching beard. His robes were midnight blue, a stark contrast to sea of black that filled the Hall. Everyone seemed to be waiting with bated breath for his words. He looked around the Hall for a long moment, his eyes twinkling. He seemed to be drinking in the sight of us.

"To our new students, I would like to say Welcome! To those returning: Welcome Back! My name is Professor Dumbledore, to those who do not know me. To those who do know me, well, it is always good to refresh your memory. I hope your summers were pleasent, and filled with mindless pasttimes. I dearly hope that you learned as little as possible over the summer. We, your ever so humble professors, do love a good challenge!" McGonagall looked as though she begged to differ. "Mr. Filch, our caretaker, would like to remind you all that the Forbiddon Forest, as its name implies, is strictly forbiddon to all students. Also, he has asked me to inform you that Phreezing Phoes will absolutely _not _be tolerated this year. To the overachieving student who wishes to obtain the full list of what is allowed and, more importantly, what is not, see Mr. Filch for a copy."

"Here, Here!" A few teachers shouted. Some of the more rambunctious students laughed. Dumbledore's eyes twinkled.

"What is a freezing foes?" I asked. Alice giggled.

"Really popular last year. You throw them at someone, and it freezes them for a good hour. We used to hit Filch with them all the time when we were out after hours and he was going to give us detention. And his horrible cat, Mrs. Norris, was excellent for target practice."

"Now that that unpleasantness is out of the way," the corners of Dumbledore's mouth twitched just a little bit, "I see no further reason to keep you from you nourishment. So I will close with just a few more words. Here they are. Oddsbillingdorf, Collingsburg, Elvendork, and Gork." With that Dumbledore took his seat again. I was stunned.

"So is he, like, a crazy person?" I asked uncertainly, without turning away from Dumbledore.

"Who Dumbledore? Oh yes, certainly." Frank answered me through a mouthful of chicken. "Off his rocker." Turning around, I saw with delight that the plates had been filled with the kind of food my grandmother only dreamed of making. Sighing a bit in the pure ecxtasy that is a good meal, I dug in.

After I had eaten all I could eat, I was suddenly feeling all of the days events begin to catch up with me. The expressions on my fellow students faces mirrored this feeling. As though reading our thoughts, Dumbledore stood up.

"I will not keep you from your beds. I will merely wish you luck in the days to come, and bid you goodnight."

With that everyone got up and exited the Great Hall in a rush. A burly fifth year nearly knocked me to the ground. To my surprise, a hand caught my elbow and tugged me back up. Sirius Black was smiling down at me. He winked, and hurried to catch up with James Potter. They seemed to have hit it off already. Feeling a bit lonely, for reasons I could not exactly place, I followed Alice Davies to Gryffindor common room, too sleepy to pay attention to where I was going.

We stopped at a portrait of an extremely rotund lady. She wore a frilly pink dress, and a motherly expression. Smiling down at us, she swung open after Alice spout out the password, _Gillyweed_, and turned to us, telling us it would probably be best if we remembered that.

The common room felt like home. That was the only word to describe it. It was filled with comfy looking overstuffed armchairs, the kind that if you sit in them for long enough, they seem to remember you, and a roaring fireplace was located in the center of the room. Many students, not yet ready for bed, had congregated around said fireplace. I considered joining them; the fire was inviting. Instead, I turned to where Alice directed me, towards the dormitories. I headed for the dormitory I would share with the only other Gryffindor first year girl. Perhaps I should make an effort. I would be living in close quarters with her for the next seven years.

I stopped in front of the door that read Gryffindor First Year Girls. Opening it quietly, I looked around. The room was spacious. Obviously it had been built to house many more than two. I saw my trunk was already placed at the end of one of the four-poster beds. That was convenient. I pulled out my pajamas and slipped them on.

The bed was the most comfortable I had ever felt. I closed my eyes and prepared for sleep to overtake me.

"I hope you don't expect us to be friends." The soft voice carried from the other side of the dormitory.

"I'm not here to make friends, you see. _This_, us being the only two Gryffindor first year girls, is an unfortunate turn of events. Because I have absolutely no desire to be your friend. " All of this was said in a soft monotone. Dorcas Meadows had a lilting childlike voice making the harsh words all the more shocking.

"Who said I wanted to be your friend?" I replied defensively, although I admit I had been thinking along those lines. Burying the hatchet and whatnot. Dorcas did not answer. Instead she tugged the hangings shut on her four poster. Minutes later, I heard the soft snores that indicated she was asleep. She did not seem to be losing sleep over this arrangement.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Morning came all too soon.

Waking up in the dormitory had been an experience to say the least. It was black as pitch, and Dorcas was still snoring when I awoke, dazed and disoriented. The hangings over my bed did nothing to allay my confusion. I had no idea where I was. Rolling out of bed, silently, I glanced around the room trying to get my bearings. The previous days events came to me like a semi-truck. I was at Hogwarts. I was in the Gryffindor First year Girls Dormitory, just like it said in gold letters on the door. My roommate was the spawn of Satan. Now that I remembered, I could not believe I had forgotten.

Eager to slip out before she woke up, I dressed quickly in my Hogwarts' robes hurried down the stairs we shared with the Gryffindor first year boys into the common room. In my haste, I did not notice another figure, obscured by the shadows of the early morning. I ran directly into Marlene Mckinnon.

"Ooof." She let out a tiny grunt as my book-filled bag caught her in the stomach.

"I am so sorry!" I whispered frantically. Marlene looked as though a puff of wind could knock her over. God only knew what my heavy book-bag would do!

"I'm fine." She smiled at me. "Quiddich player, you know? I'm tougher than I look."

No, I did not know. What I did know, was that Marlene did not look tough. She looked the polar opposite of tough. The little I had read about Quiddich up to that point led me to believe that it was a rough and dangerous sport. I felt sure one fall would finish her off. She laughed at my expression.

"I play Seeker. We're supposed to small." I nodded sagely, though I knew nothing about the different positions. I hoped she wouldn't catch on. She laughed again.

"You have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?" Smiling sheepishly, I shook my head.

"C'mon. Let's go get some breakfast. I'll explain it all. It's really not that complicated. It's just like anything in our world. Once you know about it, you can't believe you were ever ignorant of it."

On the walk to the Great Hall, I tried to pay attention to my surroundings. Hopefully, I would get to where I did not have to be escorted everywhere soon. Marlene kept up an ongoing chatter. She was remarkably talkative when not overshadowed by her much louder friends. She began the conversation with,

"So what exactly do you know about Quiddich?" To which I replied,

"Er, it's played on brooms, yeah? I think that's what I read."

This caused her to leap into a longwinded explanation of the sport. Even though I really had not the foggiest idea of what she was talking about, (Seekers, and Beaters, and Quaffles, Oh my!) her sing-song voice made it interesting. The walk to the Great Hall seemed shorter. I mentioned this, and she replied,

"Oh it might have been. It changes, you see." That was going be an enormous help with me getting my bearings.

The Hall was deserted, though the sun was just beginning to peak on in the ceiling/sky. Marlene, noticing my preoccupation commented,

"Hogwarts is not exactly a school of early risers."

She was not joking. We were the only Gryffindors up. That was okay though, for as soon as we sat down, a large, delicious-looking breakfast appeared. Although I was nervous about my upcoming classes, I had never been able to turn down pancakes and eggs. Smiling, I saw Marlene tucking into her food with similar abandon.

Gradually the others began to taper in, looking sleepy and dazed. I saw James Potter stumble in, ruffling his hair. He fell onto a bench and shoved a piece of toast into his mouth. He was flanked by the mousy, little boy, Pettigrew, and the boy with the nice voice, Remus. Remus was looking a bit better today, I noticed. He had some color in his cheeks. I noticed Severus wander in, as well. He was chatting with one of the Slytherin prefects, a tall, blond boy. He saw me watching, and smiled with his eyes.

Before I was really ready, my people watching had to end. It was time for our first class. Our first ever magical class. I couldn't help the butterlies that seemed to explode in my stomach at these words. I glanced down at my time-table. Charms. That was with Professor Flitwick. I was grateful to have my first class with a familiar teacher. Looking down at the table, I noticed that all of the Gryffindor first years were here now. None of them looked like I felt. James and Sirius were smirking, as though they had some secret knowledge the rest of us were not privy to. The expression on Dorcas' face was blank, not appearing to see anything around her. She had not touched her food. Remus's face had whitened somewhat, but otherwise, he seemed perfectly at ease. Only little Pettigrew seemed as nervous as I. I smiled at him; misery loves company. He looked around in confusion. Satisfied that I was smiling at him, he managed a little grimace back.

Alice stepped in front of the table. "Ready, firsties?"

Marlene touched my hand."You'll be fine."

Alice led us up and down unfamiliar corriders, taking such a long time that I wondered briefly if she was having us on. Finally she stopped in front of a rather ordinary-looking door. Already, however, I was learning that the most ordinary-looking things at Hogwarts were often the most extraordinary.

"Good luck firsties! You're going to need it. Your first ever class is with the Slytherins. What was Dumbledore thinking? Have fun if you can though! Don't duel anyone till you know how." Alice smiled at us then turned to walk away. I felt as though a weight had been lifted off my chest. First class with the Slytherins. Sev. I would see Sev. I wouldn't be alone anymore. None of the others seemed to take the same comfort in her words.

"Hang on, you're leaving?" It was the small boy, Pettiloo something.

"Of course. I have class too. Hey Dromeda, wait up!" She shouted at a tall, thin witch with pale features that looked chiseled from stone. Her eyes were a sharp, intense shade of grey, but her hair, long, thick and light brown, softened her harsh face. The witch turned in Alice's direction; running directly into a suit of armor in the process. It fell to the floor with a loud CRASH!

"Sorry!" She wailed, in a voice that did not match her face. "I'm so sorry. I can fix it though! Look I'll fix it." She pulled out her wand and held it over the remains of the suit of armor.

"There really is no need for that Miss. Black." A weary looking Professor McGonagall appeared. "I believe it would be best for you to get on to class."

"No really, let me help!"

"_Please_, Miss. Black. Please, just move along." Hanging her head, the girl started to walk away dejectedly. Alice caught up with her and slung an arm around her shoulders.

Smiling to myself, I turned back to the door. They did not appear to be ready to let us in yet. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Sirius Black. He had apparently been watching the suit-of-armor-scene with great interest. He seemed perplexed by something. Before I had time to wonder about it, not that I would have been able to guess, the Slytherins arrived, led by the same blonde girl who had directed Sev and me toward Hagrid the night before. Her face reminded me of the girl with pretty hair. Though her hair was silvery blond, she had the same marble features and sharp grey eyes. She also had a shiny Prefects badge pinned on her chest, and looked as though escorting first years was the very last thing she wanted to do with her morning. Unconsciously, when the Slytherins turned up, all of the Gryffindors seemed to move closer together in an obvious sign of solidarity. I was torn. Should I stand with my fellows? Or was I allowed to run up to Sev? McGonagal had called the other Gryffindors my family just last night. The very last thing I wanted was to make them my enemies. But Sev was my friend. Did my loyalty not lie with my friends?

Before I had time to deliberate the point further, the heavy wooden door to the charms classroom swung open, hitting Dorcas Meadows squarely in the nose. The crunch was sickening. Blood gushed, as her hand flew to her face. Her eyes were watering, but her jaw was clenched, and the tears did not spill over.

Little Flitwick tottered out of the classroom.

"OH!" He squeaked. "Oh dearie me. Hospital wing right away! And I ought to fix this door. So temperamental!"

"I'll take her." Black volunteered. "I know where it is."

"I can figure it out on my own, thanks." Meadows choked out. Apparently the pain was not so much that she could not find it in herself to be unpleasant.

"You'll get lost. I'll take you."

"Yes, yes. Quite right. Carry on." Flitwick was still examining the door from all angles. Averie sighed,

"Fine. Lead on." Apparently no one but me was burning with curiousity as to how Sirius Black already knew where the hospital wing was. We had been at school a total of thirteen hours. The entirety of these hours had been supervised. We had been sorted, we had eaten in the great hall, we had slept. We had been escorted to and from our common room, both last night and this morning by either the prefects or by Alice Davies, the self-proclaimed house-mother of the Gryffindor first years. No one asked him how he knew. Black did not tell. He simply took Dorcas' elbow, and led her back down the corridor through which we came, taking a right down an unfamiliar hall.

The rest of us filed into the classroom, rather shaken up. An injury already? A hospital _wing_? Not just a Nurse's office, but a _hospital _wing? What kind of _school _was this?

We all sat down in pairs at the desks, Gryffindors on one side of the room, Slytherins on the other. I made my way over to Sev and slid into the seat beside him, amid the stairs of everyone in the room, not excluding Flitwick.

Professor Flitwick looked away from us and shook his head as though to clear it.

"Right," he twittered. "Today we will be studying levitation. Making objects FLY!"

And with that he proceeded to make the books leap off the shelf and soar around the room.

"Now repeat after me. Windargdrium Leviousa." The class repeated mechanically.

"Good, good! Again," We proceeded to repeat the incantation more times than I am willing to tell you. This was magic? This was school. This was boring.

"Okay everyone, wands out!"

This I liked.

"Now, silently please, practice a swish and flick motion with your wands. Like this." He demonstrated. I turned to Sev as everyone else began to practice. He smiled at the expression on my face.

"Don't worry. It'll get better. We're just beginners right now." I was not the only one frustrated by the content of our first class. James Potter looked ready to jump out of his skin.

"Okay class, have you got it?" We nodded.

"Time to combine the two. The Wingardium Leviosa spell with the swish and flick wand motion. Ready, and go."

Concentrating, I swished my wand and added in the words. This feather was going to fly. It was going to fly because I needed to to do real magic. I done that one little bit that Sev had taught me, but it wasn't enough. I needed to prove that I belonged with these people. They lived this, from the time they were born, they lived and breathed magic. I wanted that too. If I could make this feather fly, maybe that would bring me closer.

Suddenly, to my shock, as though blown by a soft breeze, the feather danced off the desk effortlessly.

"Look! Look at this! Miss Evans has done it!" Professor Flitwick clapped his tiny hands excitedly.

I had never shone at anything, never stood out. I had always stood eclipsed by the light of my perfect sister being who she was: a star. I didn't begrudge her it. She couldn't really help it either. My parents adored her. She tried to shield me from them, pretend I shared her accomplishments. But just as she couldn't help being perfect, I couldn't help being average. Some people are just born to shine. Me? I was never good at much of anything. I don't say that for pity, I say it because it is a fact. I was always well-liked, charming, I suppose, but utterly average, never exceling at anything. This, I had assumed, would be the same old story at Hogwarts. Never have I been more wrong. This was like flying! No, flying looked difficult; this was like falling! This was easy. This was fun!

Turning, I caught Sev's eye and he winked. He had known. He had known I would love this, known I would be good at it. I could have made that feather fly all day. But alas, all too soon the class had to end, and we had to move on to Potions also with the Slytherins. According to Alice, who materialized at the door of our classroom after Charms had ended to escort us to the dungeons, it was highly unusual for Gryffindor and Slytherin to have two classes together in a row. Dumbledore generally recognized the intense interhouse rivalry, and paired us together as little as possible. A cloudy expression crossed her face before she ran off to join her accident-prone friend.

Surely this was where my beginners luck would break. Surely it could not hold, here, in this dark, musty dungeon, home of simmering cauldrouns, whispering voices. To my immense surprise, I shone again. I could do this too! This too was a game. Put in the ingredients. Add a few others, maybe some that the book did not call for, just to make it smell more natural, and voilia. Professor Slughorn, the jolly old fat man, was beside himself with glee as he stared at the potion Sev and I created. And we had earned twenty points for Gryffindor and Slytherin respectively.

Turning around, I saw Dorcas partnered up with Sirius Black. They had come in halfway through the class, laughing and chatting like old friends. Astonishing. I didn't realize the spawn of Satan was capable of laughter. Her nose was perfectly straight again. Wait a moment. Her nose hadn't been straight to begin with! It had been crooked, taking a sharp right turn. Now it was perfect, straight. No. No, I was probably just imagining it. Leftover trauma from watching it smash right in front of me. She caught me staring, and I braced myself for her glare, but instead she merely stared back blankly, as though seeing through me. A chill broke through me, and I quickly broke contact with her eerie stare. I turned back to where Slughorn was bidding us all good day.

"Miss. Evans, Mister. Snape, please see me after class. Everyone else, have a stupendous first day." There was that word again. First. It seemed as though it had been said more today than any other day in my memory. Today was a day of firsts. Before he left, Sirius Black flicked my hair and leaned over.

"Nice potion Evans." He grinned and sauntered out of the room quickly catching up with James. James smiled at me as well. I was too shocked to smile in return.

Turning to the front of the classroom, I saw that Professor Slughorn had leveled me with a rather intense gaze.

"Evans, Evans, would that be any relation to Olana Evans, inventor of the timeturner?" He asked.

"No sir." I answered, hesitantly.

"How about Jebidiah Evans of the Wimbourne Wasps?" He asked

"No sir." I replied. Beside me, Sev stiffened. Something was up, something Sev did not like at all.

"Ileana Evans of the Department of Mysteries?"

"Department of what?" I asked, unable to mask my confusion. Sev leveled his head of house with a cold gaze.

"Miss Evans, am I to understand, you are in fact, _muggle_born?" Sev's hands had clenched into fists.

"Yes sir." Professor Slughorn's jaw dropped. He looked utterly floored.

"Professor, if I may," I paused.

"Yes, please continue," he inlined a hand.

"What does it matter? Was my potion work subpar?" Slughorn spluttered.

"Subpar? Subpar? No, it was magnificent! The two of you are the most promising first years I've seen since," he stopped, looking a bit flushed. Composing himself, he continued quietly, "most promising first years I've seen in a long time." He amended.

Sev seemed to relax at his words.

"I'm just surprised is all." He finished. "I want to invite you two to a little get together I'm having, here in the dungeons. A party. For my," he paused. " Well I can't call you my favorites, but, well, it is implied." He winked. I wanted to think about it, but Sev answered quickly,

"We'll be there."

"Capital!" We accepted that as our dismissal and took our leave.

Out in the hallway, I turned on Sev.

"Can you believe him?"

"What's wrong?"

"Him! Did you hear that?"

"Hear what? Oh that. No, listen, I know it sounded like he was insulting you. I was upset at first too. But he was complimenting you!"

"Complimenting me." I repeated tonelessly.

"Yeah!"

"Well I didn't take it that way. He was much too surprised that a muggleborn could be good at _anything_. I don't think I'll be going to his little get-together."

"Oh but you have to! If you get in good with Slughorn now, he can really help you out later in life. He's got ministry connections like you wouldn't believe. Trust me, you don't want to get on his bad side. And turning down an invitation would get on his bad side." Sev's tone was earnest, and his words were ominous.

"Besides, how bad could it be?"

"Don't say that." I told him seriously. "Don't ever say that. It's tempting fate."


	5. Bad Dreams, Good Food, and Some Latin

**Okay. A lot changed in this chapter. Like, enough to reread it. The dream went in an entirely different direction. Might want to reread this one. If you don't want to, you'll be fine. I just don't want any confusion :-) Much love, much love! Review**

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_"Lily" _

_"Mmm" _

_"Lily, wake up!" _

_"Mmm"_

_"Come on," A familiar voice was in my in ear. "It's breakfast time. You know how mum gets if we skip breakfast. It's like a cardinal sin. Come on Lilikins. Up. UP!"_

_My eyes snapped open. Petunia was perched on the side of my bed. I glanced around my room. Still at Hogwarts. I slowly began to scoot backwards. _

_"What are you doing here?" I asked tremelously. Petunia stared at me, then let out her ringing laugh._

_"You are so silly, Lily. I go here. I'm a witch too. Just like you. Now come on. We're going to miss breakfast if you don't hurry." I glanced down at Tuney's clothes. She was wearing Hogwarts robes identical to the ones I wore. Her shoulder length, thin blond hair was tied back in two plaits held with burgandy and gold bows. She didn't look like a witch. But then, neither did I. Neither did anyone who went to Hogwarts. I assumed it was something that came with age. I slid out of bed. I was also wearing my robes; did I fall asleep in them? _

_"Finally!" Tuney smiled and grabbed my hand. We ran down the stairs into the deserted common room._

_"Where is everyone?" _

_"Probably already at breakfast. You slept a looong time." Her eyes flashed a little, like they used to when we were young, and I did something that displeased her. _

_"Sorry," I mumbled. _

_"It's all right." She allowed magnanimously. She tugged me through the portrait hole, and I let her, wondering where my newfound independence had gone. I'd had it last night, hadn't I? I could find my own way from place to place. Why was she leading me? My world felt fuzzy and blurred around the edges._

_"You can let go of my hand, you know." I informed her._

_"No I can't actually. Silly Lily. Without me, how would you find the Great Hall?" Tuney rolled her eyes like she always did when I was being a silly child. She continued to tug me down staircases and through doorways. We walked for an inordinate amount of time, making so many twists and turns. I began to get worried. I had no idea where we were, nor did I have a clue how to get back._

_"Tuney, I don't think we're going the right way." _

_"Yes we are. Trust me Lily. I know the best way. The only way for you. You have to come with me. You have to follow me." _

_I continued to follow blindly, as the corridors grew darker, darker and more blurred at the edges. They seemed to be growing smaller as well. I began to hear voices behind me, recognizable voices, calling my name as though from very far away, strengthening my resolve. "Tuney, this is wrong." I stopped dead. "I won't go any further."_

_Petunia stared at me, a mixture of disgust and terrible sadness on her face. She was no longer wearing Hogwarts robes. She seemed older, thinner, sadder. She was dressed like our mother. "I can't take you back, Lily. I have to keep going." _

_Then Tuney was gone, continuing down the dark, narrow corridor. I watched her for a long time, watched as her far away figure was joined by two others. The clinged to each other in their dark, narrow corridor. I was all alone. I had made too many turns. I had no idea how to get back. I slumped down onto the floor, tears slowly leaking out of my eyes, hating myself for being helpless, hating myself for following Tuney again. _

_"Lily!" I heard a voice shout, almost frantic, but loud and comforting in its familiarity. "Lily! I know you're here! You've got to answer me, Lily! I can't do this on my own!" I knew that voice. It was deeper, to be sure, but I knew that voice!_

_"James!" I croaked out. Why did his voice sound so familiar to me? It was as though he were a long lost brother. No, that wasn't quite right. He was something else. I couldn't quite place what I felt for him. But, before I could figure it out, he was there lifting me off the ground and grinning down at me._

_As soon as his hands touched mine, my world cleared. No longer blurry, I could see my surroundings much more easily. The corridor was still dark and narrow, but much less formidable and suffocating. Like Petunia, James was much older as well. Before he and I had been within millimeters of each other's height, with me being, perhaps, slightly taller. Now he towered over me. Other things had changed, too. His face was angular, all cheekbones and jawline. It had lost any childish roundness. His body was no longer the skinny body of a little boy; instead his muscles were lengthened, hard and strong. Regardless of the changes, I knew him. My entire world shifted to encompass just the two of us, and the feeling of security that had been growing ever since I'd heard his voice melted over me like a warm blanket._

_I threw my arms around his neck. _

_This was apparently not odd behavior because Old James' arms found their way around me with the greatest familiarity._

_"It's okay Lily." He whispered into my hair. "I know the way back. It's okay. I'll take you back."_

_Slowly we began to wind our way back through the dark corridors, until finally I saw light. It was just ahead, seemingly floating in midair. As we grew closer, I could see that it was a doorway. Excited, I ran ahead, but Old James stopped dead. I paused waiting for him to catch up but he didn't. _

_"James?" I called tentatively. James stared at me, then slowly backed away. He had the oddest expression on his face. _

_"Aren't we forgetting something?" As soon as he said the words, I remembered. "We were forgetting something. Where was it? How could we have forgotten something so important? What was it? _

_I looked longingly at the light, but turned to rejoin James. _

_He was gone. _

_"James?"_

_"JAMES?"_

_"Where are you?_

_"Lily?"_

_"LILY?_

"WAKE UP, LILY!" My eyes snapped open again, to see James and Sirius standing over me. Sirius was smirking at me, an evil sort of smirk that made me incredibly nervous.

"What the hell?" I mumbled, looking over Dorcas to see out the window.

"Up and at 'em." Sirius jerked the comforter off me and I threw my wand at him.

Sirius caught it. He stared at my wand, a slow grin stretching his face.

"Did you know that when a witch throws her wand at a wizard, it's the equivalent of a lady giving a knight her colors to wear? Or better example, a chick throwing beads at a dude on Mardi Gras?" He asked conversationally.

"Give me my wand back, Sirius." I was unnerved by my dream, still so vivid in my mind, and as tired as I had been upon falling asleep the night before. "And go away."

"No. I don't much feel like it, thank you." Sirius stretched across the end of my bed like a dog. I rolled my eyes and kicked him.

"Get up, Lily." James was practically shaking with glee. "We've got something to show you."

"It's the middle of the night."

"No, it's actually 5:38 in the morning."

"I just went to sleep two hours ago."

"You can sleep anytime, Lily! Now are you going to get up, or are we going to have to make you?" Sirius looked much too excited at the prospect.

I moaned and rolled out of bed. "Go away. I have to get dressed."

"If you take too long, or go back to sleep, we'll just be back up here." James said, warningly.

"And next time, we won't be so nice."

I slammed the bathroom door in their faces.

Fifteen minutes later, I stumbled sleepily down the stairs into the Common Room, deserted, just like my dream, and wondered if the school provided coffee. If not, perhaps they should start. I had never tasted coffee, but I had a feeling I would need copious amounts just to keep up with these two whirlwinds who had less befriended me than they had adopted me. I stumbled over to where they sat on the couch. I collapsed on top of both of them.

"Finally," they said simultaneously, standing and dumping me on the floor. They made for the portrait hole, then turned. Sirius stared at where I sat, still crumpled on the floor. "What are you doing down there?" He asked disdainfully.

I decided not to answer. Instead I picked myself up, and followed them out of the Common Room into the equally deserted corridor. We began to make a winding path around the school. For a moment, I was reminded disturbingly of my dream, but my sister was nowhere to be seen so I supposed I was safe. We stopped in front of a statue of a hump-backed witch.

"Okay. Check this out," James said, pointing at said witch.

"We know she does _something_," Sirius continued, a sly expression on his face.

"We just don't know how to make her do it," James finished, looking at me expectantly.

"How do you know she does something?" I asked through a yawn.

"A fifth year told us. We caught him crawling out of this general area," James pointed vaguely at the witch's stomach. "And we made him tell us." Sirius finished smugly.

"You made him tell you."

"Why is that so hard to believe? We can be very persuasive."

"You're eleven year old boys who know less curses than a house-elf."

"Ah!" James clutched his chest. "You wound me, Evans."

"Besides, I like to think I know more curses than a house-elf. I know more curses than some of the Seventh Years." For once, Sirius didn't look proud. James and I decided, somewhat simultaneously, not to comment.

"So you are telling me this because?"

"You were better than me in Charms. And that's saying something." James said seriously.

"So modest." I rolled my eyes.

"Modesty is for those who gots no skills. I gots skills."

Sirius cut off our bickering. "So anyway, we were thinking that maybe you could figure out how to open 'er up?"

I stared at the hump-backed witch for a long time. Then I turned back to the boys.

"Are you going to tell me where it goes?"

"If you can open it, we will. If not... I guess you'll never know." Sirius, smug bastard, knew my weakness.

"I'll work on it. No promises."

"Excellent," they said in unison.

I laughed. "Now I'm starving though. Let's go get food." I turned to walk towards the Great Hall. Sirius grabbed the back of my t-shirt.

"Stop manhandling me!" I shouted, waking up several portraits who shot us disapproving glares.

"We're not going to the Great Hall. We have an even better place to get food."

"Where?"

"Straight from the source, sweetheart." Sirius draped an arm around my shoulders. I thought, seriously, about kicking him in the shins, but decided that I was too hungry to compromise my food source.

Bewildered, I followed, or rather, was dragged past the Great Hall, taking a left by the Charms classroom, down three flights of stairs, past a classroom I did not recognize (perhaps Divination? I thought I saw a crystal ball out of the corner of my eye.), up another flight of stairs which I thought to be a bit redundent, and into a wider hallway that was empty except for a nondescript painting of a bowl of fruit. With a flourish, James stepped forward. He turned and bowed to me in a chivalrous manner, then proceeded to tickle the pear.

"What? James? What are you doing?"

Sirius placed a hand over my mouth. "Hush."

"Mmmm. Mmmph."

"OUCH!" Sirius dropped his hand and jumped away. "Did you _bite _me?"

"Maybe. Why is James molesting the fruit?" But my question was answered as I my question was answered as I spoke.

The portrait swung open to reveal a steep stone staircase, more narrow than any of those we had traveled down as of yet. James led the way, and Sirius shoved me slightly towards the opening. As I walked further down the stairs, the air grew cooler, as it did in the dungeons. After what seemed like days, or perhaps my mind was addled by hunger, the narrow stairway opened into an airy, open room. It was remarkably bright for it's position in the castle. Based on the amount of stairs we had climbed down, we were somewhere underground. Sirius followed my line of thinking with a grin,

"Directly underneath the Great Hall. See those tables? They're identical to those we eat off of. The elves place the food on the tables when it's time to eat, and it appears in front of us. Cool, yeah?" Both boys seemed in awe of their find, and I was too, a little. I tried not to show. They already wore "oh aren't we clever" smirks.

"Instant gratification." I mused. Then I latched onto the one word in his explanation that completely floored and bewildered me. "Elves?"

"House elves. Usually found in castles, such as this one, and upper class wizarding homes." His nose wrinkled slightly in distaste. "Not all of them are as pleasant as the Hogwarts variety." His face darkened, as it always did when he spoke of home and he would say no more. James quickly changed the subject.

"So, what tickles your fancy this fine morning, Evans?" He grinned at me and led me over to counter, which I now noticed was swarming with the ugliest creatures I had yet encountered in my new world. Their heads were too large for their skinny bodies. They had sparse, cottony hair, and huge eyes, the size of my fist.

One, with a nose that resembled a squashed tomato, became aware of our presence. She gave a mighty squeal, and dropped the teapot she was polishing, so that it rattled, unharmed onto the floor. Another elf shot her a disapproving glare, and ran behind her to pick up the teapot and set it delicately on the countertop.

"Ahh! Ooohhh me. The young masters are back!" She shouted, quickly grabbing the attention of every massive eye in the vicinity. "And they've got a little girlfriend with them!"

Both Sirius and James wore identical expressions of deepest disgust. "She's not our--" They began, but the elf cut them off.

"Is you hungry? Of course you be! Sookie is so silly. You is growing boys. And girl." She allowed. She snapped her long fingers and a stream of plates on spindly legs ran out for her inspection. I realized after a moment that somehow, elves were holding the plates up, though they were perhaps twice their size.

At the whoops of delight that only food can inspire in adolescent boys, I turned my attention to the contents of the platters.

Waffles, eggs, bacon, breakfast ham, toast with every kind of jam imaginable, french toast. And the pancakes. Every kind of pancake I had ever heard of, and even some that I was sure the elves had invented. Buttermilk, blueberry, chocolate chip, pumpkin, cinnamon, nutmeg, and a curiously green variety that I was pretty certain I wouldn't be sampling.

Within moments, the food was in front of us along with silverware and napkins. It took only moments for the boys to tuck in. I couldn't decide what I wanted. I ended up grabbing some of everything.

I count that meal as the best I've ever had. Today, I've eaten in countless fancy restaurants with impeccable reviews in the Prophet. I've even dined with both the Prime Minister, and the Minister of Magic, not simultaneously of course. But that meal, in the kitchens, sitting on rickety stools with two boys who couldn't carry on a conversation but for the food in their mouths, and me, not even pausing for breath, not pausing to wonder how it must look if a little girl can put away as much food as a boy, that meal was the best one I've ever had.

After about fifteen minutes, James let out an enormous belch and leaned back. Sirius dabbed his mouth with his napkin, as though he had not been little more than a savage moments before, and turned a sideways look at James. "Honestly James. That's disgusting. Show some class." He belched much louder than James had and leaned back with a satisfied smirk.

I pretended to scoff and look disgusted. Then, I stood up beat them both. The paintings on the wall rattled. James and Sirius were dumbfounded. I giggled, curtseyed, and made my way to the portrait hole.

As I left, I heard James say to Sirius, an expression of awe on his face, "I'm going to marry that girl one day."

It was later that afternoon. I was in the library behind a pile of dusty old books. I was exhausted, annoyed, and, remarkably, hungry again. I was having no headway whatsoever with the Humpback witch.

I was buried beneath books, a feeling of rising hopelessness threatening to overwhelm me.

If I couldn't figure this out, why would James and Sirius ever hang out with me again? They wouldn't have any reason to. They would realize I was utterly useless. Just like Petunia realized. Just like everyone realized. My head fell onto the desk.

"Lily? You okay, Lily?" Alice Davies was standing over me, a look of concern on her face.

"Mmmph." I muttered.

"Didn't catch that."

I lifted my head. "I said I'm all right."

"Oh. Okay." Without asking for permission, she pulled up a chair, rather like Petunia would have. "You know, you don't look all right, actually. Want to tell me what's wrong? You can't have this much homework already. _I _don't have this much homework."

"I'm working on a project. Sort of separate from school."

"Very ambitious." Alice smiled at me. "Maybe I can help you. Want to tell me a little bit?"

I was torn. On the one hand I wanted to tell Alice everything. She had been living in this world her entire life, while I had been here less than a week. On the other hand, I highly doubted James and Sirius would want this little side project to get out. Considering their penchant for secret keeping, I was amazed they had told _me_.

I settled for a noncommittal, "Umm."

Alice looked amused. "Maybe you could just give me a general idea of what we're looking for?"

"I need an incantation that will reveal something hidden." I said vaguely.

"Huh. There are a lot of those. Is it a hidden object, a hidden person, a hidden place?"

"Place."

"That narrows it down a bit. Okay, most of our spells have root in Latin. You know anything about Latin?"

"A little. Studied it in school, but it was really boring. I mostly slept through that class. Wish I'd paid more attention now." Out of all the subjects to sleep through, I had to pick the one I would need as a witch. I should have slept through Maths.

"Okay." Alice disappeared for a moment, and returned with an ancient looking book of Latin translations. "It's one of ours, so it will be the actual spell, not just the translation. That's handy. Look through it. Look up hidden, reveal, disguise, anything pertinent." She handed me the book with a self-satisfied smile. I gathered I was her good deed of the day. Or maybe she was just sweet.

"How do you know so much about this?"

"This isn't my first rodeo. I've had to find spells before. This castle is full of little nooks and crannies that are password protected, so to speak." She grinned conspiratorially at me. "Hope you find what you're looking for." She stood up, ruffled my hair, and left the library, presumably off to help some other first year nearing a mental breakdown.

I flipped through the oversized book.

The spell to reveal something hidden: aperium. The spell to restore hidden things: absconditus. The spell to lift a disguise: dissendium. Those were good ones to try. I jumped up out of my chair with renewed energy.

Back at the humpbacked crone, I tried the first two spells to no avail, although the witch winked at me after the second. Apparently I was getting warmer. The only one left was the spell to lift a disguise. Dissendium.

I tapped the witch with my wand. To my mingled shock and delight, a hole big enough for a slightly skinny person to slip through opened up. Trying to decide what to do with my find, I decided to find James and Sirius. I didn't want to do this on my own.

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	6. A New Year With No Mistakes In It

**NEW CHAPTER!!!! FINALLY!!!!!! **

**Okay, if you went straight to this chapter and didn't check out the new/old stuff, I'll fill you in. I revised the first part of the story to make it more canon. If you don't want to go back and reread, I'll just tell you that Averie Dawson is now Dorcas Meadows. That's pretty much all I did. Only I did a lot more too ;D. **

**Okay, I did a major time jump. We pick up Lily's story at the train again, start of her Second Year. Enjoy!**

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I tapped my foot against the floorboard of the car, excitement leaving me breathless. The feeling in my stomach was back; the feeling that indicated adventure was just around the corner.

My summer had been indescribably dull. Tuney was no longer speaking to me, and my parents and I had little to talk about. If not for Sev, I would have gone mad. He could generally be found at my house every day, as we had fallen back into the easy comraderie that had escaped us at school. He hadn't felt like my brother so much at school, as much as someone I had to defend, protect. Our relationship constantly had to be defined for disgusted students who raised their eyebrows questioning my sanity. But at home everything was safe and familiar, including Sev.

But I'd missed my friends. Their absence had left me with a kind of ache I hadn't know exsisted. James, Sirius, and Marlene, to whom I'd grown close, wrote regularly, but I'd not had any other contact with them. I could not wait to be back at the castle which was fast becoming home to me, with the people who were fast becoming my family.

I'd even missed Dorcas' surly silences and pointed glares. And that was saying something.

"You know, pushing won't get us there any faster," my dad laughed and pointed at my feet which were pressed against the floorboard as though I were pressing an imaginary gas pedel. I smiled sheepishly and tucked my feet underneath me.

We pulled the stationwagon into the parking lot at Kings Cross and I tugged my trunk out of the boot. Dad helped me place it on a trolley, and I practically ran to Platform 9 3/4. I looked around for a familiar face, and saw no one. I paused waiting for my parents, impatiently. Petunia had decided not to come along this time, I cannot say that I was disappointed.

My parents were far behind me, but I could not leave them. They would never make it across the barrier without me.

"Same as always; packed with muggles!" An obnoxiously loud voice filled my ears. My ears pricked up immediately; any wizard was a welcome sight.

"I cannot believe they force us to walk through this atrocious muggle establishment. I would gladly live out my life and never lay eyes one of the creatures. Do they smell off to you, Orion? I think they smell off. Perhaps they do not bathe. I've read that some muggles do not bathe. Would you hurry up, Sirius? Honestly, if you move any slower... Pick them up, put them down. Merlin Behind the Veil, you might as well not even be moving."

I whipped my head around at Sirius' name. There he was. He looked a little peaky; his defined cheekbones just a little too sharp, his skin just a little too pale. His eyes fell on me, and I could see him taking in the same mental inventory. His expression turned panicked and he begin making frantic hand gestures telling me to stay where I was, please, for the love of all things magical and muggle, stay where you are.

I didn't listen, of course. I dropped tthe coat that had been draped over my arm and took off towards him at a run. I saw his resigned expression just before I threw my arms around his neck. He hugged me back in the awkward way twelve year old boys hug, patting my back lightly. I let go.

"Missed you!"

"I could tell," he smiled wryly, darting a look towards what must be his parents, then back at me again.

"Have a good summer?"

"Pretty shitty, actually. You?"

"_**Sirius Orion Black! You watch your language! Muggle swearwords. What will become of you?"**_

I felt some confusion at her words. What in the world was wrong with muggle words? What was wrong with muggles? Sirius shook his head slowly, silently begging me not to comment. I obliged. Sirius so rarely begged for anything.

"So, aren't you going to introduce us to your _friend_?" Mrs. Black said the word with the same intonation of one talking of leeches.

"Mum, this is Lily. Lily, meet my dear mum." Sirius made the introductions wearily. "We're leaving now." He informed her, grabbing hold of my elbow and steering me toward the barrier.

"Wait just one moment. What is your surname, little girl?"

What did it matter? "Evans," I informed her, lifting my chin a little. I didn't like her tone too much.

"Lily Evans. Of the London Evans clan?"

"Um, no. Of the Privet Drive Evans clan."

"What's your lineage?"

"Drop it, Mum." Sirius spat through gritted teeth.

"I'm muggleborn if that's what your asking." I replied bracing for a fight. I'd heard about these kinds of wizarding families from Marlene. They thought they were better just because they were all-wizard.

"Sirius, what have we told you about consorting with trash?" Mr. Black cut into the conversation in a velvety smooth voice.

Sirius' voice was low and dangerous. The temper I'd only guessed at was simmering just below the surface and I realized quickly that I needed to diffuse the situation before he actually lost it.

I grabbed his hand, and, upon seeing the expressions of horror on his parents' faces, smiled sickly sweet. "Come on, Sirius. We don't want to miss the train." I tugged him towards my parents, whom I kissed and grabbed my trunk from. Then, turning back to his parents, I pulled a face, and wrapped my arm around Sirius' waist. We ran towards the barriar together. When we made through, both of us bent at the waist, unable to control our laughter.

"Did you see--did you see--"

"Their face! Oh, god, your mum's face!"

Incoherent with giggles, we dragged our trunks to the train and Sirius heaved both into the luggage compartment with startling ease. He was skinnier, but there were muscles in his arms that I hadn't noticed. I also noticed a fair few girls eyeing him speculatively. I rolled my eyes. He was just Sirius, after all.

Suddenly I was knocked off my feet in an act of violence that was either an attack or a hug.

"JAMES!" I shouted in his ear.

"LILY!" He shouted back.

I laughed and shoved him off me. "Good summer?" I asked.

"Dismal. You weren't there." He bowed gallaently and I lauged again, swatting his shoulder.

"You are so full of shit, James." Sirius said, clapping his friend on the back.

"Sirius! Didn't see you there! How was your summer?"

"Bloody fantastic." He said flatly. James looked concerned, but dropped the subject with a pointed look from Sirius.

"It's Remus!" James said joyfully.

"Oooh I see Marlene! And Alice!" I squealed and ran over to where they were standing with Isabella and Emmeline, struggling with their heavy trunks. I threw my arms around them, trying to hug everyone at once. Emmeline stepped away, fixing her long golden hair where I'd mussed it, disgust written on her pretty face. I rolled my eyes.

"Great to see you too, Emma!" I grinned. She shook her head. She really wasn't so bad. She'd even tutored me in Transfiguaration towards finals when I was certain I'd fail. She just acted like a bitch. Okay, she was a bitch. But, she was a Gryffindor bitch, and Gryffindors stuck together.

Marlene cuddled me close. Either I'd grown or she'd shrunk, for she barely reached my shoulder. "It's so great to see you!" She sang happily.

Alice looked pale and drawn, but she ruffled my hair and grinned. "Life's not the same without you jumping on my bed every morning at six o'clock." She allowed.

"Every morning. Every single morning." Emma moaned, glaring at me. I laughed and she cracked a smile.

"Would you look at that. That's what the ice-queen's family looks like." Alice murmured, staring at something behind me.

I turned. A large, limping man stood next to Dorcas. He was heavily scarred and missing several apendages.

Emma shuddered delicately. "I'd be bitchy too if I were genetically programmed to look like _that_."

Dorcas saw us staring and glared.

"Aw. And here I was thinking maybe she'd grown up a bit over the summer." Marlene actually looked a little disappointed. "Too bad."

We all stared at her in amazement. "What?" She asked innocently.

I shook my head. Marlene was much too good for her own good.

"Come on!" Alice said finally, a little of her old spark returning. "Let's find a compartment before all the good ones are taken.

"They're all the same, Al." Isabella pointed out.

"Oh no. They most certainly are not." Emma raised her eyebrows, daring anyone to contradict her.

I smiled. It was good to be back.

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**Okay, what did everyone think of the time jump? Too weird? All right? Let me know! **


	7. Meadows, Hogsmeade, and Coming Home

**Another new chapter!!! Enjoy!**

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"Meadows."

"Evans."

Dorcas and I stood on opposite sides of our dormitory, her expression of intense dislike mirroring my own. Sighing, I broke eye contact first. I flopped down on my bed, wishing more than ever that Marlene was my roommate instead.

"Good summer?" I asked wearily.

"Piss off."

I gritted my teeth, the familiar fury, that only Meadows could bring out in me, rising in my chest. "Look I'm trying here. The least you can do is--"

"How thick are you, Evans? I. Don't. Care. I don't care if you're trying. I'm tired. I want to sleep. So _**piss off**_!"

I jumped off my bed and walked/ran from the room. I would have preferred to storm, but I think the fact that I tripped over my own feet ruined that effect. It was these damn huge flippers growing from my ankles. I'd had another growth spurt over the summer and my arms and legs were even skinnier and ganglier than ever. My dad had jokingly compared me to a colt, unable to use it's long limbs properly. Much as I hated to admit it, he was right. I now towered over James and Sirius, a fact that had not escaped their notice.

James was still so small and skinny. He had an intense case of Little Man's Disease, and did not appear to realize that he weighed eighty-five pounds, tops. He walked with that same laughable swaggar, and ruffled his hair every time Emmeline Vance or any of the other pretty Fourth Year girls came near.

Though Sirius, slightly taller than James, was the dark sort of handsome that had already made several of the older girls stand up and take notice, he did not seem to care. Isabella Duncon, the Quiddich playing Third Year, had already made a fool of herself in his presence, but he had merely smirked and turned back to James and to Remus who was hanging out with James and Sirius much more than last year. He seemed delighted with the attention they were paying him, and I was glad they had chosen him as their project this year. He was sweet and appeared to be painfully shy. He deserved to have friends. I just hoped I wouldn't be forgotten.

I wandered into the Common Room, still smarting from my confrontation with Meadows. Was this how it would be _all year_? The squishy red couch by the fire was starting to look very inviting. Rounding the corner, however, I saw that it was already taken by several First Years, who looked immensly overwelmed. Sirius and James were eyeing them speculatively, and I could practically see the wheels in their heads turning. Whatever they were planning did not bode well for the trusting little souls with their wide eyes and their naive mindsets.

I intercepted them on their way to the red couch. "Nuh uh." I shook my head and placed my hands on my hips. I was bigger than them, and I was fully prepared for a fight. James rolled his eyes. His hand jumped to his hair, and he shoved me lightly in the shoulder.

"Oh lighten up, Carrots."

"Yeah," Sirius smiled innocently at me. "We were just going to welcome them to the school."

"Maybe draw them a map," James continued.

"Offer to tutor," Sirius went on.

"Tell them about the pool in the astronomy tower,"

"Inform them that Hagrid loves it when you pick the Halloween pumpkins for him,"

"Tell them McGonagall's nickname is Minnie, and instruct them to call her that whenever possible,"

I'd heard enough. "I don't think so." I shoved them gently back towards the chairs where they had been sitting. "If you want to amuse yourselves, you can help me think up ways to murder my roommate. I'd prefer it not be messy. I have a weak stomach."

Remus' eyes widened a fraction. He'd been sitting in the corner, next the chairs playing Gobstones with Peter. "She's not so bad, Lily." He said, smiling.

"She is a nightmare. No wonder she doesn't have any friends," I spat.

They were silent. "What?" I asked, flushing with embarressment rather than fury this time. "What?"

"I uh, think she heard you." James said.

I turned slowly around to see Dorcas disappearing through the portrait hole. Sirius sighed. "I'll go after her."

"No, let me!" I felt terrible. It was after hours. She could get into horrible trouble!

"Don't you think you've done enough?" He asked in a harsh tone he'd never used before. Not with me, anyway.

"Please?" I asked quietly. "I want to make it right."

Sirius stared at me for a moment. Then he smiled a little, and I knew I was forgiven for insulting his friend. "You sure you want to risk detention, Evans? Put a black mark on your perfect record?"

I sniffed. "I only have a perfect record because I don't get caught like you fools." I moved to sashay to the portrait hole. Unfortunately, I tripped over my god-awful feet, and nearly fell flat on my face. My face felt red-hot, but I didn't turn around, not even when their raucous laughter filled my ears. Honestly. _Boys!_

I caught up with Dorcas quickly; she hadn't time to go far, and I was running. She stared at me in disgust as I caught up with her, panting and sweating.

"What?" She asked in her childish monotone, her eyes flashing dangerously.

"I wanted--" I bent at the waist, panting. "To apologize." I stood straight and looked her at her. She was facing away, and seemed so doll-like. It seemed impossible that she could be so meanspirited. "I was out of line." She turned at looked up and me, and I had to stifle a gasp. Her eyes were red-rimmed and swollen.

"It's fine." She whispered pitifully. I couldn't resist. I wrapped my arms around her the way one might embrace their baby-sister; the way Tuney had embraced me so often after a fight. She immediately stiffened.

"Did I say or do anything to make you think that this is okay?" She asked, her voice muffled against my hair. She squirmed a little, uncomfortable.

I held on a minute longer, before letting her go and smiling. "You looked like you needed it."

She looked, for an ever so brief moment, like she wanted to smile. Her lips twitched. Then it was gone before I could even blink. "This doesn't change anything."

I sighed. "I know."

"I still hate you." She informed me in a matter of fact tone, as someone might say they hated peas, or homework.

"I'm aware," I laughed a little. I found that I didn't hate her quite as much. Maybe, just maybe, she felt the same way. Baby steps to, well not friendship, but to the sisterly relationship we were dangerously close to falling into.

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"Ouch! That was my foot James."

"Gerroff my leg, Lily."

"What am I sitting on?

"My head, Sirius. That would be my head."

"Ow, my arm!"

"My foot!"

"My eye!"

"Get off!"

"You first!"

James, and Sirius, and I were currently in a dark, narrow passageway, definitely not made for the bulk of three people at once to cram in a clump. It was an extraordinarily uncomfortable fit, what with what I hoped was James back smashed into my face, and Sirius' leg pressing into my stomach. We were getting too big for this.

"I do not recall this being such a tight fit last year." James said in a strangled voice.

"I concur. I think Lily got fat."

"Me? If anyone's porked out it's you Sirius. Have you stopped eating since we got back to school?"

"Hey! Do you know what food at my parents' house is like? Lousy. And their favorite punishment is still bed without supper. Or bed without lunch. Or bed without breakfast. I'm amazed that I didn't waste away." Sirius concluded this speech in a dramatic whisper that made me kick him

"OW!"

"Oh, sorry James. I was aiming for Sirius."

"Well remind me never to let you go out for Quiddich. Your aim needs work." I felt James take a deep breath before continuing. "Okay. We're going to get up one at a time. You first Lily. We'll try to push you off at the same time."

"Count of three?"

"One."

"Two."

"Three!" With a valient push, I managed to get upright on the correct side. I was slightly too tall for the short passageway, but if I stooped a bit, it wasn't so bad. I heard James and Sirius right themselves behind me. Slowly we began inching along, towards Honeydukes. We hadn't been to Hogsmeade since the start of term and I needed my butterbeer fix. We'd been regulars at The Three Broomsticks the year before. We'd just had to be careful to steer clear of Hogsmeade weekends and jump into the bushes whenever we saw a teacher coming and we were golden. We'd never even come close to being caught. Well except once, but we'd all dived under James' invisibility cloak before Hagrid had caught sight of us. James' invisibility cloak had saved up on numerous occasions from certain expulsion and I was more than a little gratefully to James' dad for trusting him both unwisely and implicitly.

"You know, we should bring Remus next time." I said as we crawled up the stair case that led into Honeydukes basement, listening closely for any employees. There were known so we clamoured out amongst the boxes and quietly up the stairs, mingling with the patrons.

"Remus Lupin?" Sirius asked as though the thought had never occurred to him.

"Yeah. He's nice. And Pettigrew's a bit of an idiot. I feel bad for him having to hang out with that guy all the time." James mused.

"Pettigrew's all right. Oooh we should bring him too! All the Second Year Gryffindors!" I was excited at the prospect. Like a party! Unbidden, Sev entered my mind, but I shook him off. I felt horribly guilty for not hanging out with him as I should.

"Dorcas too?" Sirius asked slyly.

"Absolutely not." I said firmly.

Sirius shook his head. "She's not bad, you know."

"Uh, yeah she is!" James cut in. "She's obnoxious and meanspirited and too small to hit!"

"Yeah!" I echoed. "It's so annoying that you can't even smack her because you might break her!" Any comraderie I might have felt for Dorcas had long since disappeared. I shivered and pulled my coat tighter around me. "Come on. I'm frozen." I tugged the boys into the toasty warmth of The Three Broomsticks.

"So we are definitely bringing Remus next time around?" James asked.

"I suppose," Sirius yawned. "Not Pettigrew though." He turned to me. "He _is _an idiot. And when we hang out with him, it makes us look like idiots."

"Nice, Sirius." I rolled my eyes and sipped my steaming butterbeer. James sipped a hot chocolate.

"Pansy." Sirius commented on James' choice of drink. James took a huge gulp burning his throat and giving himself a foam-stache.

"You know, I don't see how Pettigrew can make James look like a bigger idiot than he already is." I mused.

James through a wad of napkins at me. I turned to Sirius. "We should probably ditch him."

Sirius stretched and tilted his chair back on two legs, a lazy grin finding its way on his face. "Yeah, but then you'd trip over your own two feet and ruin it. Looks like I should strike out on my own, being the only cool one in the group." He closed his eyes.

James and I stared at each other. At the same moment we kicked the closest leg of Sirius' chair, knocking it out from under him. He fell to the floor with a clatter that made everyone in the room turn to stare. Sirius turned a rather unappealing shade of magenta and got to his feet. The blush faded. He bowed to the inhabitants of the bar, and winked at the pretty barmaid. He put his chair right and sat down slowly. Very slowly, he wiped the butterbeer he'd sloshed onto the table. Then he calmly picked up his drink and dumped it on James and my heads in such a quick movement, we did not see it coming.

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"Should I even ask how your summer was, Sirius?" I was curled on the squishy red couch by the fire, next to Sirius who looked stiller and more weary than I'd ever seen him. That too-old look on his face was back, the too-old look that seemed to be held at bay whenever James was near. He brushed a hand over his eyes in exhaustion. He was silent so long I thought perhaps he wouldn't answer.

"It was long,"

I nodded slowly. "Mine too."

"Family?" He asked me.

"Sort of. My sister and I, we don't speak."

"I'm sure you speak sometimes. Every teenage girl hates her sister."

"No, Sirius. My sister and I don't speak. Ever. She did not say hello when I got off the train. She did not say pass the ketchup at dinner. Even when I camped out in her room, she did not say get out. She just acted like I didn't exist."

"My parents were like that too." He said quietly. "You remember how I said they sent me to bed without dinner all the time?"

I nodded. "

I lied. I sent myself. I couldn't stand the silence, and my mum staring at me like I was the biggest disappointment. My little brother felt horrible for me and would sneak me food upstairs; he's a good kid, you know? But my mum and dad? The day at the train was the first time they'd spoken to me all summer and even then, just because my cousins were going to be at the station. Have to keep up appearances, you know? I guess should be, but I just wish that they would have shouted. Then I wouldn't have had to spend all summer waiting for the other shoe to drop."

Sirius leaned his head back and slung an arm around my shoulders. I leaned on him, closing my eyes. "We've got family." I whispered. "You are my family. James is my family. It doesn't matter that everythings messed up at home, right? Even when we're not in school anymore." I could feel myself rambling and I could feel more than hear Sirius laughing at me. Then he sobered up.

"We are family." He said, almost wonderingly. "When did that happen?"

I laughed. I could see James across the room staring at us, a question in his eyes. "I always wanted a brother." I mused. "I gotta say a psychopath with bad hair and questionable hygiene wasn't exactly what I had in mind...."

"Bad hair?_** Bad hair**_?" Sirius put me in a headlock and I squealed and fought to get away. "You're one to talk, Carrots." He said, smirking when we quieted down. James wandered over towards us, Remus and Peter in tow.

I stared at Remus. He really did not look so good. I had been so preoccupied with Sirius and his neglected state, I'd not even noticed how truly terrible Remus looked. He'd always been a bit sickly looking. Today, though, his face was ghostly white. His hair had been cut short, but sat, lank, on his head. His eyes were so tired. He looked exhausted, the look of one who'd just gotten over a grieveous illness. Peter, luckily, looked happy and healthy. He looked excited at the prospect of being included in our little group. I laughed a little and he turned to look at me. I hoped he hadn't thought I'd been laughing at him. Sirius eyed Peter with the same distaste that he'd eyed him with all last year. I shook my head. Sirius was so full of himself.

"What are you guys over hear dishing about," James asked, grinning.

"Dishing, James? Really?" Sirius wrinkled his nose, looking every inch the disgusted aristocrat. For someone who hated his family so much, he really did have a lot of familial quirks.

I leaned back. Remus smiled at me, and I smiled back, somewhat hesitantly, feeling for the most brief of moments, that something was horribly wrong with my fairy tale. Happiness like this did not last, not really. I worried for Sirius and his family, and for Remus and his mysterious illness. I worried for myself, and how I would put myself back together if I lost this family too.

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**This chapter felt a lot cheesy. Please note that I'm pretty sure it was on purpose. Or maybe it wasn't. Ugh. Please review and tell me if I should tone down the processed cheese!!**

**  
ALSO!!! I want to shout out to Smileyface55 who has reviewed, without fail, every chapter! I 3 you!!!**


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